Why to live?
by Wolf's Shadow01
Summary: Sango remembers her past and feel her heart crushes. She has lost everything just to win more and lose it again. ( I suck at summaries, please read!)


The curse of living

Some people say life is a gift, a blessing, for me it is nothing but a curse. Why keep living if you have nothing, why bother with suffer if you have anyone who cares or loves you.

This is my story, a story of suffering and sorrow. The story of how I lost everything just to win something more and lose it again.

I was born in a youkai exterminators village. My life was really happy until that day, when I lost my mother.

Both of us, my mother and me, were in the forest near the village picking some herbs, suddenly an oni snake attacked us. My mother was an exterminator so she could have destroyed the snake without any problem if I weren't there. The snake tried to bit me, and my mother tried to prevent it. She did it. She saved my life, but with the highest price, hers. My mother died that day. My father was really sad, and my little brother was still a baby. After that, I learned how to fight, how to kill youkai without any mercy, just like they did to my mother. Life was hard, but I had enjoyable moments, specially with my brother Kohaku.

Then it happened again. I lost everything I had, this time it was even worse. All because of the shards of the Shikon no Tama and because of that worthless evil creature, Naraku. He tricked us, he made Kohaku kill our father and some other exterminators, and then he destroyed all the village. Kirara, my loyal neko youkai and my best friend, and I were the only survivors. Kohaku was being controlled by Naraku, I have lost my family and had no friends. But I am grateful for meeting some new friends. It may sounds crazy, but our friendship starts with a fight with the "leader" of their group, an inu hanyou. I tried to kill him because Naraku made me think he was the one who have destroyed the village. He defeated me. He has all the right to kill me and I would not try to fight it, it was fair and honorable. But he spares my life. They asked me to join their group and I accept it, maybe my fate will be better that way. It was, but for a really short time.

We traveled for months collecting the shards, knowing that some day we will have to fight Naraku and his creations along with Kohaku.

That day arrived, our last chance to destroy him, to save this world from his evil and to change our fates. The last battle with Naraku. Even Koga, the wolf prince, and Sesshoumaru, the lord of the Western lands, were there to help us, we all hate Naraku.

We fought with all our power but it was not enough, we lost. The wolf prince was the first to die, followed by Shippo and Kagome, who tried to protect the young kitsune. I started crying when I saw my lost friends. Inuyasha was badly injured, Miroku too and there was no sight of Sesshoumaru. Then I understood, it was my fate to live losing those who I loved, and then to die and finally rests. Naraku was not paying me any attention, everyone else were dead, even my poor Kirara who fought valiantly until the end. He looked at me with those blood red eyes and I tried to stand on my feet, with help of my Hiraikotsu.

"I hate you Naraku!" I tried to keep fighting, but it has useless, I was too weak. "Poor exterminator, you have lost everything and you still fight for your life, what a fool you are. It will be easier to kill you here and now, but I will enjoy seeing your suffer and grief. I spare your life, and condemn you to live it."

Here I go again, I am alive, but at what price?.

I should be dead too, I should have died long ago. I should have died the day my mother did. But here I am, laying weakly on a forest, full of sorrow and pain. Why do all of you have to leave me, why do I have to be the only one left? I can not live with this, carrying on my shoulders the weight of your deaths, and I will not. I will die with you. I am selfish, I know, but it is the only way I can think to release myself of this. Forgive me father, I have failed but I am weak and forgive me you too, my friends, but I will see you again. I use my sword one more time, the last time. There is blood in my hands, my own blood. I am really grateful that I will finally rest, stop my suffering and see you all again.


End file.
